More on Marriage

Does the bible say that Christian marriage is a sacrament and more than a mere civil contract?

Yes, and we find the evidence from the mouth of Christ. The Lord tells us: "He who made man from the beginning, made male and female and the two shall be one flesh; therefore, now they are not two, but one flesh. What, therefore, God has joined together, let no man put asunder" (Matthew 19:4,5,6). St. Paul adds: "Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the Church, and delivered himself up for it . . . This is the great sacrament; but I speak in Christ and in the Church" (Ephesians 5:25,32).

What is the special grace that comes with marriage?

They are given the divine grace to join their hearts into a more intimate, more lasting, and more holy love. They are enabled to raise their children in reverence or holy fear and love of God.

Does the bible actually say that married people should not remarry while their spouse is alive?

Jesus made it quite clear: "For this cause shall a man leave father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife, and the two shall be one flesh . . . what, therefore, God has joined together, let no man put asunder" (Matthew 19:6).

Does the bible forbid divorce?

Yes, although many Churches, which profess Christ, have permitted it on their own authority. It is evidence that the Catholic Church is the true biblical Church and the one steadfast in Christ and his truths. Difficult teachings are not eliminated or ignored simply because they are difficult or out of fashion. A proper reading of Matthew 19 shows Christ's mind on the subject: "What, therefore, God has joined together, let no man put asunder." Then they ask Jesus, "Why then did Moses command to give a bill of divorce?" Our Lord responded: "Because Moses by reason of hardness of your heart permitted you to put away your wives. But from the beginning it was not so, and I say to you that whosoever shall put away his wife, except it be for unlawful conduct (actually incest), and shall marry another, commits adultery. And he that shall marry her that is put away commits adultery." Again, St. Paul adds upon the subject: "But to them that are married, not I, but the Lord command that the wife depart not from her husband, and if she depart, that she remain unmarried, or be reconciled to her husband. For the woman that has a husband, while her husband lives, is bound to the law. But if her husband be dead, she is loosed from the law of her husband. Therefore, while her husband lives, she shall be called an adulteress, if she be with another man" (1 Corinthians 7: 10-11). Obviously the rights of the husband and the wife are here the same and the law holds for the husband, too.

Does the Catholic Church grant divorces?

No, although there is an annulment process which many Catholics pursue after a civil divorce. If it is determined that there was a serious impediment to a true marriage in the first instance, a marital union might be declared annulled. However, if the marriage was true, then it is indissoluble. If the first marriage is a valid sacrament, it can only end at the death of one of the spouses.

Why does the Church forbid marriages among relatives?

The prohibition in Matthew's Gospel is certainly part of the answer. Besides violating the natural order, such bonds often prove wanting and the offspring deficient in mental and bodily development.

Why is there the custom of publishing banns?

Often made optional today, or dispensed by lawful authority, banns were published as a public announcement. Not only did this notify a parish community, but it also prevented perilous elopements, and invited general information about their freedom to marry. After such a publication, one would quickly discover if there was a prior promise from either of the parties to marry someone else of if there was a serious impediment to marriage.

What are the duties of husband and wife?

They are to live together in peace, love and fidelity. They are to raise their children as good Christians, sharing each other's joys and sorrows.

How is this sacramental covenant enacted?

Taking each other's right hand, they render their vows and consent before the priest or deacon. The priest blesses them and confirms their union. The priest witnesses the marriage as the couple themselves are the actual ministers of the sacrament. The rings are blessed by the priest and they place them on each other's fingers with the appropriate prayer. A Nuptial Blessing comes at the end of the service. If it takes place during Mass, and they are both Catholics, they will also receive Holy Communion. The marriage is fully consummated when they go home and share the marital act.